Mam & Golu

Mam: Agar me teri maa ban jauto tuje 2 din me sudhar du!

Golu: madam me abhi jake

apne bapu ko btata hu ki..

bapu teri lotery lgne wali hai

Diploma

Nani (to a kid): Soja DIPLOMA soja!

Padosan: diploma kyo bulati ho isse?

Nani: Meri ladki College DIPLOMA lene gayi thi,

ye leke aa gayi..!!

Ek Ladka aur ek Ladki ki shaadi hui

Ek Ladka aur ek Ladki ki shaadi hui..

Aap yakeen nahi karoge ke doosrey din hi

Unka Bachaa hua

khana kharab ho gaya..

Fridge me nahi rakha tha na !

I Love you!

Aurton ke Ek Group se poocha gaya ki kon kon apne SHOHRON se pyar karti hain?

Sab Ne Hath khare kardiye...

In sab ko ek-ek msg dia giya k apne apne SHOHRON ko send karen...

"I LOVE YOU "

To Inke shohron ke jawab kuch youn aaye...

1: Tumhari tabiyat theek hai na? 

2: Ab kya ho gaya ? phir se car maar di.

3: Excuse me!

4: Sirf itna batao ki kitne paise chahiye?

5: Nasha to nahi kar lia?

6: Ab kya kardia tumne? main is baar maaf nahi karoonga.
Aur Sab Se acha jawab ye tha.
.
..
...
7: Kaun hain aap?

Malik Aur Murghiyan

'Agar tum sab ne 2-2 ande nahi diye to tum sub ko kaat dunga...'

Agli subah sab ne 2-2 ande diye, magar 1 ne 1 anda diya...

Malik: Tum ne 1 anda kyun diya.

Usne kaha,"abe kaminey..... woh toh katne ke darr se de diya...... warna main toh Murga hun !!

How to Stop Telemarketing Calls...

I called at Vodafone Customer Care, a girl picked up the phone.

Girl: Vodafone care mein aapka swaagat hai.

Me: Thank you.

Girl: Mein aapki kya sahaayta kar sakti hun??

Me: Kya aap shaadi karna chahti hain mujhse??

Girl: Jee aapne galat number laga diya hai.

Me: Nahin nahin, maine sahi number lagaya hai, aap shaadi karengi?

Girl: Jee mein shaadi main interested nahin hun.

Me: Arre madam sun toh lijiye ek baar.

Girl: Not interested.

Me: Love marriage karengi toh honeymoon Switzerland mein, arrange marriage karengi toh Paris mein.

Girl: Jee mein aapse shaadi karna hee nahinchahti toh aap offer kyun de rahe hain??

Me: Court marriage ka expense 10,000 Rs, normal wedding ka expense 2,00,000 Rs.

Girl: Aapko samajh nahin aata ki mujhe shaadi nahin karni phir bhi aap samajhte nahin.

Me: Ab pata chala madam aapko humara dard, jab hume aapke offers mein interest nahin hota phir bhi aap humaari naak mein ungli karne baar baar call karti rehti hain.

Girl shocked, I rocked....